Mr. Saturn’s Stars #14 Weekly Horoscopes 12/11-12/17, 2017

Weekly Horoscopes for 12/11-12/17, 2017

 

Hi kids!!! Mr. Saturn here. Glad to have you back! Like many of you, for better or worse I will soon be heading home for the holidays, which for me is my native sign of Capricorn; A mountaintop, a bunch of freakish half-goat, half-fish relatives to deal with… All I can say about that is…Fa la la la la…..la..la ……la…….la………..ugh.

Aries- The week will begin in a vacuum with a Libra Moon un-aspected in your House of Relationships, meaning you’re either depressed that you don’t have a relationship or else you don’t know what to do about the one you’ve got. Either way a Scorpio Moon conjunct Mars mid-week in your House of Transformation will find you feeling alone and/or alienated enough to do something you’ might regret… but don’t!!! Mercury Retrograde meeting up with Venus in Sag could bring an old friend to the rescue. You’re feeling crazy so let off some steam with someone who knows how weird being you can get.Mr. Saturn would suggest perhaps some karaoke to welcome the New Moon? “Twenty, twenty, twenty-four hours ago…..I wanna be sedated…..nuthin to do nowhere to go-oh…..I wanna be sedated.”

Taurus- This week could be a real slow burn for you. A Libra Moon with nowhere to go except where everyone else seems to want it could see you compromising yourself into utter frustration either on the job or at home. By the time the Moon gets into Scorpio mid-week and gossips with both Mars and Jupiter, you’ll be roundly chastising yourself. “How could you let them do that to you?” you’ll say to yourself, or else to your poor pet that just wants to lie next to you in peace. Uranus in your House of Secrets will make you fantasize about all the murder and mayhem you could enact upon these people in vengeance, however, by the time Mercury Retrograde and Venus meet up in bubbly Sagittarius over the weekend you’ll be ready to forget all that and go back to saying, “Namaste” to everyone. Mr. Saturn already knows what he’ll get you for Christmas….a big bottle of booze.

Gemini- With the Moon starting the week in your House of Fun (and the sign of Libra) you’ll probably feel compelled to be a man or woman for all seasons for both family and friends, but is that what you really want to do? With 5 major planets in your House of Relationships (including Mercury Retrograde) and all of them in dippy Sagittarius to boot, be careful you don’t forget how certain individuals have already shown you they are not as nice as they pretend. When the Moon enters Scorpio in your House of Routines and joins with Mars and Jupiter to aspect Pluto in your House of Death and Transformation, seize your power with these users and wield it as decisively as if you were a self-absorbed two year old….”nonononono!!!!!!” “That’ll show ‘em,” say’s Mr. Saturn.

Cancer- Having a directionless Libra Moon in your House of Foundations to start the week is making you feel so conflicted between your desires and responsibilities that if you agreed to a session with a shrink you’d probably be diagnosed as a schizophrenic. There are 5 major planets transiting through your House of Work and with all of them watching a rebellious, iconoclastic Uranus in your House of Career acting like Bart Simpson and giving them all the finger, you keep asking yourself just how much more of this you can take? When the Moon enters your House of Children to join both Mars and Jupiter as they all trine Neptune in your House of Philosophy, you’ll eventually remember who you’ve been sacrificing for all this time. Make sure you also remember that nothing in life lasts forever. As he pours you a nice glass of wine, Mr. Saturn will add, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you’ll get what you need…..oh yeah..”

Leo- You will be torn this week between freedom and responsibility. With 5 planets transiting through Sagittarius and your House of Creativity and all of them lining up with innovative, individualistic Uranus in your House of Philosophy, you’ll be wanting to write your own ticket and make up your own rules. However, Mercury Retrograde in Sagittarius may be singing behind the scenes to those other Sag Planets, “Turn, turn, turn, there is a time for every purpose under heaven.” The Moon, Mars, and Jupiter in Scorpio in your House of Home will likely agree, as they demand your attention instead be focused on an intervention for a lonely friend or family member who really just needs to know someone cares.

Virgo- Imagine two soldiers standing guard on the wall of a fort. One say’s, “It’s quiet,” and the other replies, “Yeah, too quiet.” Just then an Indian’s arrow hits one of them and the air is filled with screaming war cries. A series of petty emergencies may surprise you this week, but if you and your partner pull together and delegate things properly everything should work out. All of the focus for the rest of this year will probably be at home as you have 5 major planets (including Mercury Retrograde) transiting that area. They are all in aspect to Uranus in your House of Transformation, so if you can go with the flow you just might experience some pleasant surprises. If romance has been lacking as of late between you and yours, let Mars and Jupiter in Scorpio help you get the passion back. Mr. Saturn say’s, “Rrrrrrrrrrrr…….”

Libra- Having 5 major planets in your House of Communications (including Mercury Retrograde) would make this an excellent time for you to reach out, especially to a person or professional group you may have fallen out of touch with. Because Uranus is also involved, you could end up receiving an unexpected blast from the past from either an old flame or someone who has popped into your mind again recently. With Mercury and Uranus together, there’s never any telling where these surprises may lead! Mars, the Moon, and Jupiter in your House of Earnings in aspect to Neptune in your House of Work could bring an unexpected opportunity for either some quick dough or a position that could showcase a unique talent you have. Maybe Santa actually did get your letter this year?

Scorpio- With a stellium of planets in your House of Earnings and Uranus in your House of Work, the Holidays for you are going to be busy busy busy. You may end up being exhausted but you should manage to rake in enough dough to make it well worthwhile. It won’t be all work and no play though because you also have Mars, Jupiter, and the Moon in your sign this week and they are all aligning beneficially with Neptune in your House of Romance and Fun. Even if you’re feeling frazzled take the time to attend a party and hit the egg nog. You never know, that overgrown elf lurking under the mistletoe and throwing back the brewski’s may just turn out to be your very own special Secret Santa (or secret Saturn if you’ve been REALLY good this year…..just sayin’).

Sagittarius- Having the Sun, Mercury Retrograde, Venus, Saturn, and the New Moon all in your sign aligning with Uranus in your House of Fun would indicate that the party this week is in Sag!!! With the Moon in Libra to start the week you will probably be feeling magnanimous and accommodating, however, once the Moon shifts into Scorpio and meets with Jupiter and Mars behind the scenes you might want to rethink your nice guy approach in lieu of certain individuals (okay, let’s be specific, certain family members) who might take advantage of your good nature. The Lunar Arc will finish in your sign over the weekend with a New Moon conjunct Saturn and trine Uranus, meaning that instead of letting the same jerks who have ruined your holiday in the past do it again, this time take the high ground. Mr. Saturn would suggest, “Bless the beasts and the children.” In other words, be nice to kids and pets and then either ignore your stupid relatives or find a comfy, out of the way spot to drink by yourself.

Capricorn- You’re like a floating iceberg this week in that most of what you’re thinking and feeling is concealed below the surface. This is because a stellium of planets in Sagittarius (including Mercury Retrograde) are all hiding behind the scenes and aligning with Uranus at the bottom of your chart. A kind and compassionate Jupiter/Neptune configuration between your Houses of Friends and Communication could help you avoid depression if you’re willing to seek out a friend or family member with whom you can vent a little to relieve the pressure. After all, the holidays can be frustrating if you let yourself get cornered into believing that everybody except you is happy with all this phony commercialism and advertised joy. On a more upbeat note amidst all this Christmas nonsense, Mr. Saturn will be coming to visit your sign just before Christmas Eve! Yay humbug!!!

Aquarius- Right now there are 5 major planets in your House of Dreams and they are all aligning with Uranus in your House of Communication. As a result, the illusion of choice for you now is popularity. The Lunar Arc will travel this week from Libra through Scorpio to Sagittarius or from establishing relationships to manipulating these relationships for fame and gain. “That sounds great,” you say, which may actually be the problem. Mars and Jupiter in Scorpio transiting through your House of Career and Public Image would indicate that no matter how broad your smile and no matter what promises you are making to all the people you’re asking for help, the simple fact is this is all about you. Pluto camped out behind the scenes would indicate a need to transform the notions you have about love change from adoration to humility, but then again you’d have to be able to be by yourself to deal with that, which is the scariest place in the world for you right now. The New Moon in Sag shacking up with Mr. Saturn will likely arrange for you to have your illusions for a while longer, so enjoy it while you can. Mr. Saturn’s haiku this week is yours:

To think your ego

Is what will conquer this life

Defines Black Magick

Pisces- A traffic jam of planets in your House of Career (including a very dissident Mercury Retrograde) are all causing you to have illusions of practicality about your former ambitious illusions. Now what could that possibly mean? Well, maybe the river you initially chose to cross wasn’t really the right one for you (which of course you wouldn’t hear at the time)? Nevertheless, changing horses now when you’re 3/4 of the way across is ridiculous, especially since you’re so close to finishing and learning whatever it is you’re supposed to. Now do you understand? Probably not, mostly due to the fact that transiting Mars in Scorpio aligning with Neptune in your sign at this time is giving you a real passion for not having a clue and being defensive about it. You think choice and responsibility are mutually exclusive just because they’re two different words, well, not to whoever is sponsoring this adventure you’ve been having….have you thought of that? When the New Moon tattles to Mr. Saturn on Sunday he may just make you aware of it.

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #12 Weekly Horoscopes for 11/27-12/3, 2017

Weekly Horoscopes 11/27- 12/3, 2017

 

Hi kids!!! It’s terrific to have you back at Mr. Saturn’s Stars!!! The Holidays are officially under way, but before we begin with this week’s horoscopes I would like to share some things that have been on my mind.

First, has anyone ever noticed that the letters in Santa can be rearranged to spell Satan? What’s that about? Furthermore, Santa is this old man who traditionally encourages little children to sit on his lap. You think all this #metoo stuff is going to catch up with Kris Kringle the way it has with seemingly every other older white guy in power? I mean he’s already been caught kissing Momma underneath the mistletoe more than once. I would also bet that no matter what he does or how many accusers come forward, there will still be people who’ll leave cookies and milk out for him on Christmas Eve. What a world, huh?

I got nothin…

 

Aries- The angst you’ve been feeling lately is going to make it very difficult to control yourself this week as volatile Mars in your House of Relationships moves closer to a frustrating opposition with erratic Uranus. Mr. Saturn and Mercury will try to talk some sense into you, although what they’ll have to say may be more about what you’re secretly afraid of rather than the kind of pep talk you’d prefer to hear. The Sun in Sagittarius moving into a square with Neptune won’t help matters much, especially over the weekend when they both form a hallucinatory T-square with the Full Moon in Gemini. Let the illusions begin! Jupiter in trine with Neptune will try to introduce some compassion into this never-ending therapy session, so try having a little forgiveness for your self. As Mr. Saturn would say,

How much of our fear

Is simply the learning curve

For finding our strength?

Taurus- As the Moon passes through your sign this week stability will be at the forefront of your concerns. Letting go of unreasonable fears associated with being unstable will also be a challenge as Mars and Uranus move closer to a very testy opposition in your Houses of Hidden Feelings and Daily Routines. Saturn conjunct with a Mercury Station/Retrograde should give you fresh eyes with which to look at an old problem that could appear over the weekend as a Sagittarius Sun opposes a Full Moon in Gemini and both of them square Neptune in your House of Dreams. A Jupiter/Neptune aspect in psychic Scorpio and sensitive Pisces respectively could help you finally understand that what you’re currently faced with is not an old problem haunting you, but rather a new you trying to break free of old misconceptions. Mr. Saturn’s advice?… Breathe.

Gemini- Mr. Saturn conjunct with a Mercury Station/Retrograde in your House of Relationships along with erratic Uranus opposing Mars could have you jumping to all sorts of conclusions about how you’ll never find the right person to have a storybook relationship with. The worst case scenario here is that the Gemini Full Moon squaring Neptune over the weekend will find you laying at the bottom of yourself like a forgotten prisoner in a Third World jail. Of course this isn’t true, but the only way you’ll get to that light at the end of the tunnel is to embrace life rather than withdraw from it. A Jupiter/Neptune trine will be there to help with your healing if you’re willing, so, as Mr. Saturn bangs some hopeful chords on the piano the song he’s singing is for you…”When you’re alone and life is making you lonely you can always go…Downtown!”

Cancer- The world under your feet is shifting like the undertow at the beach, yet remember you are a crab and your nature has always been able to survive in the turbulent surf. As a crustacean you can seem tough on the outside but you are really soft on the inside, so make sure you are taking care of yourself emotionally during this very challenging time. Or I should say let someone else take care of you for once. A loving and sensitive Jupiter/Neptune trine would suggest that you are on the verge of a new sense of purpose in life, although don’t think you will discover this inspiration by digging for it. Let it come to you like the waves that always find the shore. Mr. Saturn’s haiku this week is for you….<3

“If I seek knowledge

Perhaps it’s there, if it finds

Me the truth is here

Leo- The pressure for you this week will be between what needs to be done as opposed to what you’d like to do. With the Sun, Mercury, and Mr. Saturn all in your House of Creativity and Uranus in your House of Philosophy, you’re brimming with great ideas and have lots of energy to express your self. However, with the coming Full Moon in Gemini ready to square Neptune and oppose the Sun, as well Mercury about to go Station/Retrograde, you may just feel a need to defer your desires and put someone else first. Just make sure this someone is worthy of your sacrifice. Your natural leadership skills and compassion make you an easy mark for manipulators who like to play the victim and there’s someone like that in your life now. Mr. Saturn would suggest, “Take this time to look deep within yourself to decide what you really want, although make sure you don’t wind up sticking your head up your ass in the process.”

Virgo- With Mr. Saturn and Mercury going through your House of Foundations you have been in the midst of reconstructing your life for a while now. Mars opposing Uranus in your money houses (specifically earnings and shared resources respectively) are making you anxious regarding the investments you’ve made as of late in both time and money. Realize though that the transformation you’re hoping for may not be able to fully come about until you’re willing to stand up to a contradictory (or even controlling) partner and take charge of a situation that was originally your idea. This will be highlighted when the Sun, the Full Moon in Gemini, and Neptune all align in a tense T-square involving your Houses of Public Image, Home, and Relationships. Mr. Saturn would suggest that right now the obstacles facing you are not the undetermined external factors around your ultimate goal, but rather your own confidence (or lack thereof) about what you deserve.

Libra- Mars in your sign has been pushing you forward, but an opposition from Uranus in Aries has been dealing you one unexpected obstacle after another. At the same time Saturn and Mercury in Sagittarius have been teaching you some invaluable lessons and helping you to grow. When Mercury goes Station/Retrograde at the end of the week you should take the time to consider if you have been making all the changes you really need to. Jupiter in your House of Earnings is a blessing and Venus joining the Sun in Sagittarius should add an air of optimism, however the Full Moon in Gemini squaring Neptune to end the week might leave you feeling a little worried regarding your future prospects. Saturn inching toward Capricorn at the lowest point in your chart is certainly a downer, so expect your energy and optimism to be low for the next couple of weeks. Mr. Saturn would say that your life now is kind of like the sixties song, “California Dreaming,” sad words with a snappy melody, the point being that you keep dancing in the rain like Gene Kelly until things get better.

Scorpio- Jupiter in your sign aligning with Neptune is making you feel more vulnerable than you’d like right now, however, understand this isn’t about you being weak. Instead it’s about realizing that the true nature of strength is when you can allow yourself to be honest in your feelings without beating yourself up. Mars opposing Uranus could be creating a lot of frustration over a situation that’s beyond your control, although again the thing to understand here is that your frustration isn’t changing anything as the world turns. Saturn in your House of Self Worth is enhancing this tendency to beat yourself up, so when the Full Moon squares Neptune over the weekend don’t be surprised when Mr. Saturn takes you down memory lane and queues up the old Animals hit, “I’m just a soul whose intentions are good… Oh Lord!.. please don’t let me be misunderstood…”

Sagittarius- Mr. Saturn’s stay in your sign will be over in approximately three weeks and then you’ll be good for another 28 years. In the meantime though he is going to make sure that you learn every lesson you possibly can. Mercury going Station/Retrograde in your sign during this period will further intensify Mr. Saturn’s tutorial, while at the same time a Mars/Uranus opposition will serve to inspire your usual resistance when you’re confronted with having to do anything you don’t want. A Jupiter/Neptune trine followed by Neptune squaring the Full Moon in your House of Relationships over the weekend should cap this off as a perfect week to simply blame everything on your doppelganger, after all, you’ve never met him or her.

Capricorn- You are a resilient sign, however, with Uranus camped out at the bottom of your chart for the last few months it has kind of been been like skateboarding down a gravel incline. Mercury retrograde in your House of Secrets for the next 3 weeks may not be much fun either as you attempt to solve a mystery where you are both the victim and the perpetrator. It won’t take Sherlock Holmes or Phillip Marlowe to figure out this one though; the obvious arch villain here is responsibility. The good news though is that Jupiter trine Neptune will help you solve this case and forgive yourself in the process! There might even be a reward as well, specifically enough self-love to get you out of the “Town Without Pity” you’ve been stuck in. After a Film Noir week like this, the tendency would be to have a spree. Fair enough, but with a Gemini Full Moon squaring Neptune to end the week Mr. Saturn would advise having Ray Donovan on speed dial…just sayin’.

Aquarius- With Jupiter in your House of Public Image aligning with Neptune in your House of Self Worth you are bound and determine to establish your legend. A Mars/Uranus opposition combined with a Saturn/Mercury pairing will further motivate you to put on a sandwich board, bang a drum, and toot a horn to try and draw as much attention to yourself as possible, but to what end? Be careful when the Sun squares Neptune that you don’t start believing your own hype, because when those two pull up to form a stressful T-square with the Full Moon over the weekend you may wind up crying the “Tears of a Clown” all by yourself. When Mercury goes retrograde over the weekend as well he won’t hesitate to say “I told you so” as you learn “self-worth” and “the approval of others” are not the same thing. Mr. Saturn is cueing up a song now, check out the lyrics…”When the truth is found to be lies and all the joy within you dies…Don’t you want somebody to love?”

Pisces- Your ruling planet is Neptune, the God of the Sea, who symbolizes both illusion and higher consciousness. In other words, sometimes you have to do something really stupid in order to learn anything at all. Jupiter in your House of Philosophy aligning with Neptune could help you realize this about yourself so that hopefully you’ll wise up and stop taking for granted someone you depend on. A Mars/Uranus opposition going on in your Money Houses while Mercury slows down to a Station/Retrograde will also be forcing you to re-examine your financial responsibilities. In short, this week will seem like you’re stuck in a hall of mirrors so that no matter where you turn you can only see yourself. How long it takes for you to realize your immaturity will be, as Frank Zappa once said, “The crux of the biscuit.” In the meantime, Mr. Saturn is going to wax nostalgic with some Beatles…”the Love you take is equal to the Love you make…”

Excerpts from “Psychic Reading” by T.C. Eisele, published by Rebel Satori Press

 

Below are a pair of excerpts taken from my new book ,”Psychic Reading,” recently published by Rebel Satori Press.

If you are interested in buying a copy of “Psychic Reading” go to the menu and select “Books,” where links are provided to both Amazon and Rebel Satori Press.

 

From the Introduction…….

 

Introduction

The book you are about to read presents the dialogue for a pair of Psychic Readings. While both of these encounters are fictional creations, the material in them is based upon thousands of actual client sessions that I conducted as a Professional Psychic and Astrologer in New York City over a period of more than 17 years.

* * *

What is a Psychic Reading? The act of going to a special individual for spiritual and/or esoteric guidance has existed in one form or another since ancient times and, depending on the cultural setting, could have included activities as varied as making a pilgrimage to the oracle at Delphi in Ancient Greece, consulting a tribal Shaman, or visiting the local Witch on the outskirts of town. Yet regardless of the setting, exactly who are these special people we ask to impart to us their visions and wisdom? In what ways are they different from the rest of us? How do they manage to acquire the insights they are sharing? What does it mean to be Psychic?

The human brain is perhaps the most profound Machine in the Universe, but where do our thoughts come from? We each possess consciousness, but what is our awareness made of? Modern Physiology will tell us that we use only 10% of our brain’s capacity, which would then mean that 90% of our mind’s potential remains dormant within us. If that is the case, then perhaps in the same way that the genetics for an entire tree can exist within a tiny acorn, maybe all the secrets of the universe can also be explained within the untapped portions of the human mind? If this is true, then maybe the Gurus and Psychics we go to for insights are really nothing more than normal people like ourselves who have found a way to activate more than 10% of their innate intelligence? Maybe the late Psychologist and Philosopher Timothy Leary was right when he said, “The Brain is God”?

Clairvoyance, clairaudience, and clairsentience, or the abilities to see, hear, or perceive expanded realities and non-ordinary states of being are among the sorts of powers commonly considered Psychic, yet the relative truth of these experiences are extremely difficult to verify, or even comprehend in terms of conventional understanding. To the general public the popular idea of a Psychic is someone dressed up like a gypsy or a witch who predicts the future using Tarot Cards and a crystal ball. However, if one can manage to put such stereotypes aside the actual truth is that real Psychics, while in possession of one or more of the aforementioned abilities, are also often highly trained individuals in an Esoteric/Occult sense who are capable of offering valuable insights and guidance to those who are in psychological or spiritual crisis.

 

From “The Second Reading” pages 42-46

 

READER: What do you do?

TOM: I’m a musician.

READER: Professionally?

TOM: Not exactly.

READER: Oh?

TOM: Well, I’m in a band, but we’re not working right now.

READER: So what do you do to earn a living?

TOM: I’m a bartender.

READER: How’s that going?

TOM: It pays the bills but I’m pretty frustrated with it.

READER: When was the last time your band played a gig?

TOM: About 6 months ago.

READER: Why is that?

TOM: I don’t know, it seems like it’s hard for us to agree on anything.

READER: Are you in a relationship?

TOM: I don’t know.

READER: You don’t know?

TOM: Well, there’s this chick I’ve been seeing… but, I don’t know…

READER: Is there anything right now working out the way you’d like?

TOM: Sure.

READER: What would that be?

TOM: My Spiritual Studies are going well.

READER: Really? What are you studying?

TOM: I’ve been reading about developing my Psychic Abilities, Remote viewing, stuff like that.

READER: Where are you getting your information?

TOM: From an Internet blog by a guy named Beelzebuddy.

READER: Do you find these studies are useful in regards to the other stuff in your life that isn’t working?

TOM: What do you mean?

(The Reader tilts his head like a dog when it’s confused and then reaches over and grabs one of the large books on the table.)

READER: Let’s get to work. What’s your birthday?

TOM: September 1, 1980

(The Reader opens the book and flips through the pages until he finds what he’s looking for. After studying the information in front of him for a few moments he then begins speaking)

READER: Do you know if you were born before or after 12 noon?

TOM: I’m not sure.

READER: All right, don’t guess. Just answer me this…How curious are you, or better yet, how distracted can you get?

TOM: Well, I am interested in a lot of things.

READER: How often do you finish what you start?

TOM: There are some things that I let slide, but then again I can also be pretty responsible….

READER: …..When you have to be, right?

TOM: I guess you could say that.

READER: Have the responsibilities at your job caused you to let your music slide?

TOM: It’s not like I’m obsessed with my job or anything like that. I plan on getting back to playing; it’s just that I’ve gotten really interested in Psychic stuff.

READER: So let me get this straight… you’re working at a job you don’t like, reading about Psychic stuff, and also thinking about getting back to your music?…. I would say you have a Gemini Moon.

TOM: I thought I was a Virgo?

READER: Your Sun is in Virgo, but your Moon is in Gemini. To say you are a Virgo is like saying you’re a man; there were 9 other planets circling in the heavens on the day you were born and each of them represents an archetypal aspect of your character. For instance, Saturn would represent your control issues, Neptune your imagination, the Moon your emotional style, and so on.

(The Reader takes the next few moments to look at the book again before continuing to speak)

You have a Virgo Sun and it squares a Gemini Moon. Both of these signs are ruled by Mercury, which represents communication and information. As a result, you feel an emotional need to have a constantly changing set of circumstances (your Gemini Moon), which you are forever juggling and trying to orchestrate together into some useful pattern (your Virgo Sun).

(Tom leans forward in his seat and stares intently at the reader)

You also have Mars in Scorpio, which is always about power, and that both sextiles your Sun and inconjuncts your Moon. In short these configurations can cause you to oscillate significantly back and forth between ambition and withdrawal, as well as lending a stealth air to how you generally deal with people. In other words, you don’t like people to know what you’re up to and usually keep things on the down low.

TOM: It says all that in the book?

READER: Not necessarily, that’s my interpretation……….any questions?

TOM: Not bad

***If you are interested in buying a copy of “Psychic Reading” go to the menu and select “Books,” where links are provided to both Amazon and Rebel Satori Press.

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #7 Horoscopes for 10/23-10/29, 2017

Hi kids!!! Welcome once again to Mr. Saturn’s Stars. We are now officially in the Witching Season as the Sun enters Scorpio, so rake those leaves, carve those pumpkins, and remember, the trick is to treat your self.

“One can’t learn much and also be comfortable. One can’t learn much and let anybody else be comfortable.”   -Charles Fort

 

Aries- The week begins with the Sun entering Scorpio to join Jupiter, while Mars arrives in Libra to join Venus. As a result, your passions will probably be smoldering for a certain someone like the charcoal in a BBQ pit. In the meantime, Mr. Saturn will be hovering like Harvey Weinstein over the Moon in Sagittarius, so be careful you don’t do something with this special person just because you can. Mercury in Scorpio and Pluto in your House of Career will be advising you to check and make sure if Mr. or Ms. Sexy is really available, or, if you met this person through business these planets might serenade you with a chorus of “Don’t (blah)where you eat;” either way I suggest you listen. Mercury will also be in aspect to Neptune in your House of What’s Hidden, making it easy for you to believe no one is noticing how your libido is up. Stop kidding yourself. Everybody notices, but so what? Just be careful.

Taurus- Your attitude toward life is changing, are you willing to change as well? Anger about betrayals and disappointments from the past has been sabotaging you and you’re beginning to realize this every time you look in the mirror. You have unwittingly let the dark memories you have of certain people turn into darkness for yourself. With Venus and Mars in your House of Health and Routines it’s time for you to get off the couch and rediscover the youth you have left. With a little effort you can regain the enthusiasm and creativity that once made you so magnetic. With Uranus in your House of Confinement working with Mr. Saturn in your House of Legacies, you need to find a creative outlet! When the Moon crosses your Mid-heaven over the weekend be sure you make time for something you once loved to do. It doesn’t matter where this activity may lead, it only matters that you are allowing yourself to have fun again. Even Mr. Saturn is willing to sing along!

Gemini- Every relationship we enter into goes through stages. What makes an old friend or a long time partner so important is that our connections with them become the living proof that love can survive. With Venus and Mars in your House of Romance squaring Pluto, you’re finding yourself struggling with believing that love has already found you and it’s not going anywhere. On the work front you need to stop letting someone else’s agenda cramp your style. You have the ideas, the energy, but most of all the respect of those in control. If a younger person is causing you any difficulties don’t buy into their attempts at emotional manipulation; keep your cool!

Cancer- The way you relate to others has been changing for a while, but it’s only just now that you’re fully realizing it. Rather than continuing to take responsibility for other people’s emotions, you’re instead doing what you can and then letting it go. At first you felt guilty about this, but now you understand what Mr. Saturn has been trying to tell you all along, namely that “doing something for someone else they should be doing for themselves ultimately denies them a better lesson.” Amen. Now that you realize you have all this newly freed up emotional disc space, you’re also discovering you have a lot more creative energy. So what are you waiting for? Start investing more time in your heart’s desire and see what the Universe rewards you with! This week’s Haiku is for you.

“If I seek knowledge

Perhaps it’s there, if it finds

Me the truth is here”

Leo- With Jupiter and Mercury in your House of Foundations angling Pluto, as well as Venus and Mars in your House of Communication squaring Pluto, the boundaries you have established between yourself and others will seem more apparent now than ever before. There is a wall up, but it’s not because you’re insensitive, in fact, it’s just the opposite, as you are far more sensitive than most people realize. Of course this makes you a favorite with kids and dogs, so why don’t you try to open up a little and perhaps volunteer at a youth center or an animal shelter? Unlike Jack Nicholson in “As Good As It Gets,” you won’t need any bacon in your pocket to be the one that everyone wants to go home with. Even Mr. Saturn is saying, Awwww…<3

Virgo- As Venus and Mars transit your House of Earned Income and square Pluto in your House of Fun and Creativity, you might be feeling the need to break out for a little enjoyment and howl at the moon. Of course the frugal part of you will automatically come up with reasons not to, but look at it this way, money is for spending and with Venus and Mars where they are you’re earning more than you need, so why not splurge? The Sun and Jupiter working with Neptune in your House of Relationships may also have you feeling more amorous than usual, so why not take that special someone along with you to go out and howl at the moon? Mr. Saturn say’s, “Aaaah Oooooh, Werewolves of London, Aaaaah Ooooooh!”

Libra- Pluto at the bottom of your chart is squaring both Venus and Mars in your sign as well as nudging Mercury and Jupiter in your House of Self Worth, which all together should have you thoroughly stoked up to show the world exactly what you got. Saturn in the House of Communication and Uranus in your partnership area would indicate an opportunity based on someone reaching out to you unexpectedly, or perhaps you’ll receive a response to a shot in the dark you took a while ago and just forgot about? The arc of the Moon during the week will have you ready to take some specific steps toward transforming your current circumstances and opening up some new creative and professional possibilities. With a cool and confident air, Mr. Saturn would simply say, “If not now, when? If not here, where?”

Scorpio- With Mercury in your sign aligning with both Pluto in the House of Communication and Neptune in the House of Creativity, you are on the verge of a true awakening. Mr. Saturn and Uranus are further supporting this epiphany as they act respectively in your chart like the driver and the sphinxes in the Chariot Card of the Tarot, causing you to come to the revolutionary realization that luck is who you are, not what you do. This is nothing short of a true moment of enlightenment as Venus and Mars dance in celebration together like Yin and Yang in your House of Hidden Secrets and Mystical Union. Enjoy this while it lasts, for sooner or later Mr. Saturn will turn on the lights and start singing, “Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.”

Sagittarius- You’re feeling it, so why aren’t you doing it? Jupiter and Mercury in your House of the Subconscious and Pluto in your House of Self Worth have become an itch you must scratch. Add to that Neptune in your House of Foundations and you’ll discover that you have stumbled upon one of those rare moments in life when you can see into the workings of your mind and clearly realize that guilt is a useless emotion, so why bother? Venus and Mars together in your House of Dreams are opposing Uranus in your creative sphere, egging you on like the Prince song “Let’s Go Crazy” at maximum volume. At a moment like this Mr. Saturn would usually tell you to turn it down, but instead he’s saying, “Forget that shrink in Beverly Hills, you know, Dr. Everything’ll be Alright”…. “It’s up to you to make it alright so what are you waiting for!”

Capricorn- Most of the major planets are in the public half of your chart so it’s important for you to be out there and interacting with others. Venus and Mars in your House of Career will provide the eloquence and Mercury and Jupiter in your House of Groups will provide the substance, so share your interest and excitement involving the things that matter to you. What’s hidden in the private half of your chart this week will be the Moon, Neptune, and Uranus, so try not to be derailed by your anxieties, instead use them as examples to help you connect with those who can benefit from your honesty and compassion. Mr. Saturn say’s, “don’t be a rump, offer those condolences and give something of yourself.”

Aquarius- With Saturn and the Moon in your House of Groups aligning with Uranus in your House of Communication early in the week, you could find yourself having to deliver a lecture or perform in front of an audience. If that’s the case, stick to the script and save your proselytizing for another time. Mercury and Jupiter in your House of Career aligning with Neptune, plus Pluto behind the scenes with the Moon mid-week, could cause you to make a Freudian slip you might need a stuntman for, so be careful. As a word of advice, Mr. Saturn would like to quote from one of his favorite TV shows, “Just the facts, Ma’am, just the facts.”

Pisces- If you are on the verge of making an important decision it would be good to seek some advice this week, just be sure you’re prepared to listen and seriously consider what a more experienced person has to say, even if it disagrees with what you have convinced yourself of. Especially since Saturn in your House of Career working with Uranus in Aries has you struggling with nailing down a definite plan right now. In addition, Jupiter and Mercury together in Scorpio aligning with Pluto probably has you believing that you know everything, though if that’s the case then you can’t possibly learn anything else without it resulting in you being up the creek without a paddle. Of course Mr. Saturn is willing to let you find out the hard way, and as the song goes, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try, sometimes, you get what you need.”

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #6 Horoscopes for 10/16-10/22, 2017

Weekly Horoscopes for 10/16-10/22, 2017

 Hi Kids!!! Welcome to the newest edition of Mr. Saturn’s Stars.

“Doubt is a good servant but a bad master; a perfect mistress, but a nagging wife.”       -Aleister Crowley

“Always look on the bright side of Life.”   -Monty Python

Aries- This could be a week of revelations for you, beginning with the Moon conjunct Venus in your House of Relationships making you feel surprisingly less attached to your general dislike of humanity. You’d prefer to chalk this up to a good mood, but when the Moon conjuncts Mercury and Jupiter in Scorpio and then they all trine Neptune in your House of Mysticism, cue the Twilight Zone theme and prepare for a Fortean rain of frogs as something quite powerful emerges from the depths of your psyche and you feel more vulnerable than ever before, kind of like Dorothy being scolded by the great and munificent Oz. Of course when Toto pulls back the curtain it’ll just be good ol’ Mr. Saturn ready to explain a new perspective on life from your House of Philosophy.

Taurus- You can speculate as much as you want about a situation you need to take care of this week, just don’t be blind to what’s actually going on in front of you because you might regret it later. The Moon and Venus in Libra to start the week will have you looking through rose tinted glasses, yet when the New Moon in Libra opposite Uranus occurs shortly thereafter try to stay calm if your well laid plans seem to be unraveling. With a stellium of planets in Scorpio in your House of Relationships and Neptune in your House of Groups, you could negotiate what seems to be a reasonable solution to your problem; just make sure it won’t be a slippery slope for you later. By way of advice Mr. Saturn would like to quote some wise words by by the late Malcolm X, namely, “Make it plain.”

Gemini- Venus and the Moon beginning the week in your House of Romance may have you feeling quite amorous, but for the time being all your energy is going to be needed for work. A new direction is being implemented on the job (perhaps a power play by one of your bosses) and you may be the person who will be made responsible for making it happen. A New Moon in your House of Creativity say’s you’ll work out the logistics and manage not to have too many people annoyed with you in the process. The last vestiges of a Mars/Saturn square in your House of Home and House of Relationships may find you bringing your frustrations home after having to be the ambassador of good vibes at work. Mr. Saturn say’s, “just shut up and let your partner pour the wine and tell you about their day.”

Cancer- With Venus and the Moon in Libra at the beginning of the week, you may be called upon either at work or by your family to be a peacemaker between opposing factions, neither of which you particularly agree with. Of course this will seem ridiculous and maybe even annoy you, but with Jupiter and Mercury in your House of Creativity in trine to Neptune, you do have the skills and you’re the nicest one of the bunch, so try to look at this diplomatic assignment as a compliment of sorts. The New Moon opposite Uranus along with Saturn in your House of Maintenance and Repair should help you get through this dilemma with flying colors and possibly even move your own status up a notch to boot! Mr. Saturn has got his eye on you and he’s liking what he see’s.

Leo- Mr. Saturn in your House of Creativity is a stabilizing influence now for a lot of new ideas that are finally emerging inside of you. With a New Moon in your House of Communication, you will no doubt be out there feeling optimistic and throwing around some of that Leo charm. Jupiter transiting through your House of Foundations along with Mercury and the Moon over the weekend will have you thinking a lot about home and family, and with Neptune in your house of Legacies you might start rethinking some long standing beliefs you’ve had about your upbringing. We don’t get to choose our family, but we do get to choose who we want to be. You’ve been righteous about this point for a long time, but have you realized that no one ever really stopped you from doing what you want?

Virgo- With Mars in your sign and Mr. Saturn in your House of Foundations, lately you’ve been feeling like you’re driving a car with the brake on. A New Moon in your House of Self Worth in the middle of the week should help you to finally decide something needs to change, especially now that Jupiter has entered Scorpio and its transit through your House of communications will make it very difficult for you to sit still and stay quiet for much longer if something is really bothering you. With Mercury and the Moon also in Scorpio late in the week and over the weekend, make sure you consider your words carefully before speaking, it would be much more constructive to intelligently express your frustrations instead of just venting.

Libra- Mars in Virgo transiting behind the scenes in your chart has been causing you a lot of frustration. You’re working really hard and sincerely feel you’re ready to move ahead, yet everything seems stuck. Mr. Saturn in your House of Communication keeps saying, “Be patient,” yet that’s driving you nuts. With Venus in your sign now you don’t want to seem like a complainer, so instead you remain quiet and continue plugging along. A Libra New Moon opposite Uranus should help you realize you can’t pretend to be patient. Jupiter in your House of Self Worth now would indicate that things will eventually get moving, the trick is to keep your sh*t together until they do. In the meantime, try to understand that Mr. Saturn reminding you to breathe is not supposed to make you hyperventilate. This week’s haiku is for you.

“Patiently waiting

Like a dewdrop hanging on

A banana leaf “

Scorpio- As Jupiter and Mercury enter your sign followed by a New Moon opposite Uranus to start the week, the time has come for you to speak your truth. The final passing of a previous square between Mars and Mr. Saturn will help to eliminate any elements of self-doubt, while at the same time the arc of the Moon this week passing through your House of Secrets will serve to make you more contemplative than usual. This is a good thing as Pluto and Neptune in your Communication and Creativity areas will inspire the necessary confidence for you to speak softly, yet firmly and compellingly about what you truly need from a situation or an individual.

Sagittarius- If you have ever thought about seeing a Psychotherapist (or returning to one) this week is the time. Mercury will join Jupiter in Scorpio at the beginning of the week and will remain in your House of The Inner Self for approximately the next 3 weeks. These two planets are about communication and guidance and when combined with Neptune in your House of Foundations would point to this as being the perfect time to start digging through the fears and frustrations you need to let go of. The Sun will also enter Scorpio at the end of the week (if you live on the West Coast) and serve to reinforce this cleaning out the basement theme. Venus transiting your House of Hopes at this time would further ensure help coming if you’re willing to help yourself. “A word to the wise,” mutters Mr. Saturn.

Capricorn- The arc of the Moon this week will pass through your Houses of Philosophy, Career, and Groups. Has it crossed your mind lately to teach a class in the near future either locally or long distance? With Jupiter and Mercury conjunct in Scorpio in your House of Groups and Venus in your House of Career you will no doubt be quite a charismatic source of whatever topic you’re well versed in, which will no doubt be some very serious information. Combine all this with the fact that Mars is crossing your Mid-heaven and the stage is set for you to put yourself out there. At the risk of sounding New Agey, Mr. Saturn would say, “When the student is ready the teacher appears…. So, what are you waiting for? Make your entrance!”

Aquarius- With Jupiter, Mercury, and the Moon all passing through your House of Career this week (and the Sun arriving at the beginning of next week) you definitely think you’re ready for the big time, but then again there’s Neptune in your House of Self Worth creating that comfort zone you have. So, are you walking the walk, or just talking the talk? With Saturn in your House of Groups you may have been spending a lot of time as of late being a nurse maid to a bunch that is draining your energy (but making you feel important). Venus in your House of Travel and Philosophy could raise the possibility of a   trip (inner or outer), but can you leave the need for approval behind? Mr. Saturn suggests you move around a bit to make sure you haven’t become rooted and stuck without realizing it.

Pisces- Who are you? You know what others expect, but has their approval made you feel any less confused when you’re alone? Do you even still want the same things anymore? With Neptune in your sign you must consider that everything you have believed until now could be an illusion. That might sound depressing, but it will ground you back within yourself and that’s where the truth is. Mars in your House of Relationships arguing with Mr. Saturn has been causing you to feel pressured by what others are expecting of you, thus the New Moon opposite Uranus at the beginning of the week will have you feeling either rebellious or panicked. Jupiter, Mercury, and the Moon in your House of Philosophy later in the week will encourage you to go deep within to ask some really basic questions. If this seems to daunting to do alone, ask for help. Venus in your House of Shared Resources will be there with the support you need.

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #5 Horoscopes for 10/9-10/15, 2017

Horoscopes for 10/9 – 10/15, 2017

 Hi kids!!! Mr. Saturn is talking to you this week from the belly of the beast-the Queens County Civil Court in Jamaica, Queens. Surprisingly enough, this is one of the only places where Mr. Saturn is less than himself, though you’d think he would love a good Court House or Jail, right? Actually the reason he’s in court is because he was called for jury duty. Even Mr. Saturn has rules to follow.

Aries- You will probably be feeling a bit unsettled this week. A situation is changing with an important person in your life and with the Sun and Mercury in your House of Partnerships squaring Pluto you’re not really sure how things will turn out. When the Moon moves into Cancer in the middle of the week and meets up with Jupiter entering Scorpio, you may feel like the rug is being pulled out from under you. Not really, it’s just your control issues looking back at you from a mirror being held up by Neptune in your House of Confinement. Over the weekend after a Leo Moon enters your House of Fun and makes nice with Venus in Libra, you’ll no doubt have a big smile ready when Mr. Saturn asks you to say, “CHEESE!” for his fb post.

Taurus- This will be a week of mixed feelings as you move forward with a big decision you’ve made. If you’ve recently decided to move or switch jobs, make sure you realize that your fear of change is in your head, just like the possibility of losing touch with true friends. You wanted a fresh start and now you’re going to get it. Pluto in your House of Long Distance Journeys and Venus with Mars in your House of Creativity have been planning this with you for the last month, so move forward with confidence. Venus moving into Libra and the Moon in Leo over the weekend should provide a hopeful reception from whatever awaits. In the meantime Mr. Saturn’s haiku this week is for you.

“Uncertainty forms

A space for discovery

To come and meet you”

Gemini- As the week begins you will find yourself re-evaluating your interactions with people. Mr. Saturn in your House of Relationships will be reminding you that the only one you really have control of is yourself. The way others treat you will only be a reflection of that, so stop letting someone else dictate the mood you’re in. As Jupiter enters your House of Work start letting those on the job see the real you. If you’re necessary to them then they’ll have to deal with it! The Leo Moon over the weekend will make you want to escape into the Land of Fun, where the Sun, Mercury, and Venus are all waiting.

Cancer- The arc of the Moon for you this week will begin with worrying about a friend or family member, followed by you trying to fix their problem for them, and ending with you making your own stressed out life a priority instead (at last!!!). Meanwhile, your job is still just a job, but a new challenge may be presented to you this the week that might make you forget how bored and unappreciated you have felt. A relationship should regain some of its old spark when Venus enters your domestic sphere and you decide to start bringing happy home again instead of your frustrations with the world. “Oh baby, you know what I like,” purrs Mr. Saturn.

Leo- Early in the week when the Moon enters Cancer and Jupiter moves into Scorpio your current living situation is going to become a major priority (if it isn’t already) simply because you don’t feel at home there (and never really did). You have compromised yourself into this corner for someone else and now you feel stuck. Realize you have the resources to change the situation so it isn’t you that’s stuck. It’s just that you’ve been waiting for a partner to start pulling their own weight. Maybe they need a push to get going (or is it you that needs to be pushed?)? When the Moon enters your sign over the weekend you’ll have all the reasons necessary to express yourself on this situation. Mr. Saturn is just wondering if it will come out like the meow of a pussycat or the roar of a lion?

Virgo- You’ve been occupied for a while now trying to make everything perfect before you offer your work to the world. As Jupiter enters Scorpio and Venus arrives in your House of Self Worth, it’s your confidence that’s going to have to rise to a level worthy of the work, not the other way around. You see it’s no longer about what you do (and you do it so well) it’s about what you think about yourself. The arc of the Moon this week will make you want to continue this excessive polishing of something that already shines, but what you need to realize instead is that you just have to get over a good old fashion case of cold feet. Unless of course you’d rather have your partner point it out to you? “Ouch!” comments Mr. Saturn.

Libra- A lot has been going on behind the scenes for you, in fact, if you look back, you’ll be surprised just how much your daily life has changed. It won’t be long before all the hard work you’ve been doing will start to show rewards. If money has been tight, plan on a welcome influx of opportunities and/or cash as Jupiter enters your House of Earnings and the Moon transits your House of Career. With Venus emerging out of the shadows at the end of the week and coming to visit, expect to be a little more in demand than usual. The Leo Moon over the weekend will be about friends, but don’t be surprised if you’re the center of attention. Mr. Saturn may even want to buy you a drink!

Scorpio- Jupiter is the planetary archetype of Philosophy and when it enters your sign early in the week don’t be surprised if you find yourself thinking a little bigger than usual. This expansive attitude will be helped when the Moon enters Cancer at the same time, so make sure you’re listening to those intuitive urges you’re feeling. A Mars/Saturn square will last most of the week and provide some immediate challenges in terms of your available resources, but when the Moon enters Leo over the weekend and squares Jupiter your pride will answer the call. As Mr. Saturn always say’s, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.”

Sagittarius- You seem to have so many responsibilities, but are any of them to yourself? Mr. Saturn in your sign has been like death and taxes, and his square to Mars this week will make it feel like you’re driving a car with the brake on at work. Pluto will also be aspecting Mars at this time and together they may be the answer to getting unstuck at work. That is, if you’re wiling to take a risk and look for another situation where you’d be more appreciated. Jupiter is the planetary ruler of your sign and this week it will enter Scorpio and cross the threshold into your House of Secrets. This is a very protective influence and could bring either moral support or financial help from a sympathetic friend or family member.

Capricorn- Pluto in your sign for the last minute has been like having the “Tibetan Book of the Dead” performed in your living room, although for the time being the Bardos containing the demons may be over. Jupiter entering Scorpio in your House of Hopes and Dreams at the same time as a Cancer Moon arrives in your House of Partnerships could bring a new friend or special someone into your life. Expect this person to be attracted to who you’re evolving into and not who you’ve been. Over the weekend Venus coming home to Libra and the Moon cruising into Leo will amp up your charisma, so make sure you’re out and about for the world to see. Mr. Saturn may even lower his shades to check you out!

Aquarius- With the lower part of your chart containing only Neptune in Pisces, Uranus in Aries, and the Moon, which will enter Cancer mid-week, this could be perhaps the most anxious you have felt in a while. When Jupiter enters Scorpio it will be crossing your mid-heaven, so be careful your pride doesn’t become your Achilles heel. Venus returning home to Libra is a good thing, but for you it may be no more than a nervous smile trying to hide some serious anger. After all, Pluto in your House of Secrets has been harboring more than a little resentment for a while. A word to the wise, Mr. Saturn has your House of Secrets scheduled for an audit at year’s end, so for now just try to breathe until Pluto and his work can be accounted for.

Pisces- With Uranus and Pluto camped out in two of your three money Houses, finances have been quite erratic for some time now. However, with Venus entering your House of Legacies, a welcome balance is now being introduced to that third money House so take a deep breath and relax. Jupiter entering Scorpio combined with the Moon in Cancer mid-week will serve to ignite your intuition and you may come up with some clever (and profitable) ideas. If you’ve been unemployed (or under employed) as of late, the Moon in Leo over the weekend could bring a lead for a new job. Mr. Saturn in your House of Career would add,“just make sure you’re scrubbed up right for any interview, appearances count.”

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #4

Weekly Horoscopes for 10/2 – 10/8, 2017

 Hi kids!!! Thanks for stopping by again this week. Are you ready for your straight, no chaser shot of Astrology? If any of you have any questions, or agree or disagree with anything that appears here, feel free to make a comment or even take a knee if you’d like. Mr. Saturn supports the NFL (No F**king Lies).

Aries- This week may turn out to be a lesson in the art of compromise. Even though you’re feeling inspired, maybe even visionary, circumstances may dictate this isn’t the right time for you to get your way. Of course this annoys you and having rebellious Uranus in your sign isn’t helping matters. A Full Moon in Aries late in the week will highlight relationship issues (specifically the absence of one). Mr. Saturn would suggest trying to be a little more Zen about how you could be more approachable, which would mean sitting still for a change and actually allowing someone else to do the approaching.

Taurus- On the surface you appear to be as stable as Mt. Fuji, but with a Full Moon this week in your House of Secrets you will be bubbling under the surface like a volcano. With Uranus in that secret place as well, the time has come for you Bulls to see red and put an end to all the crap you’ve been putting up with from passive aggressive (and even downright aggressive) assh*les. This weekend the Moon in your sign will be aligning with Venus, Mars, and Pluto, so be willing to let your hair down either figuratively or literally. Mr. Saturn would also add this reminder, “If you’re partying, make sure you do it responsibly and may the Force be with you.”

Gemini- Here we go again. You try to be fair to some lazy ass at work and instead end up being perceived as a push over. This week’s Aries Full Moon will be in your House of Groups and square Pluto in your house of Power, so maybe it’s time to stop worrying about being nice to a manipulator and instead be effective in dealing with them, especially if you’re going to be the one that’s ultimately responsible for what they do or don’t do. Being a History buff, Mr. Saturn would like to share one of his fav quotes, “Speak softly, but carry a big stick.”

Cancer- The arc of the Moon this week will span from Pisces to Taurus, from sensitivity to stability, with an explosive stop in between when it reaches it’s full stage in compulsive, hard charging Aries. You may be tempted to lose it at work later in the week, but don’t take the bait. The person trying to provoke you has realized you’re beyond their influence and they’re grasping at straws. Your ability at this time to be the consummate professional will not only set the tone for where you’re headed psychologically and spiritually, but it will also drive this bully nuts! Mr. Saturn’s impressed…imagine that!

Leo- The point of having stability in your life is so you won’t have to worry about it. Venus and Mars in your House of Earned Income and Pluto in your job area would show that at this time you have a solid foundation to build on. The Full Moon in Aries later in the week in your House of Philosophy is therefore going to be more about your sense of self worth rather than your material status, meaning that any real sense of security needs to come from within you and not your circumstances. As a result, be careful about coming up with excuses to defer a dream you have. What’s that? No, you’re not hearing things, that’s Mr. Saturn clucking like a chicken in the background.

Virgo- With Mr. Saturn in your House of Foundations and the Full Moon in your House of Transformation, the theme this week should be one of reconciliation. You should seriously consider the possibility that the way you think of someone can prejudice the way you interpret (and subsequently judge) his or her behavior. The Full Moon in Aries may summon up some circumstances that could help you better understand the song lyric, “walk a mile in my shoes before you criticize and accuse.” Consider also that the harsh judgments you occasionally direct at others could actually be a projection of how you feel about yourself.

Libra- You could receive a surprise this week in the form of some unexpected recognition. Venus and Mars behind the scenes in Virgo along with the Aries Full Moon in your House of Partnerships could bring an offer to promote either something you’ve done in the past that’s still relevant or perhaps a newer idea whose time has come. Mr. Saturn rewards those who do the work and he’s been watching you toiling away in your House of Writing for the last couple of years. A Taurus Moon over the weekend will help you relax with loved ones. Enjoy a nature hike or just lounge on a park bench.

Scorpio- Pay attention to your health this week. Not that there is anything wrong, but you have been neglecting your body and if you want it to keep up with your active life-style then this could be the time for a tune-up. With Neptune in your House of Romance and Fun it may also be the right time for you to come out of hiding and show the world you’re available. Venus and Mars in your House of Friends and Groups will insure that you shine with that unmistakable Scorpio allure, while Jupiter behind the scenes under the light of a Full Moon could bring you luck in the form of a very interesting stranger. Woo woo!!!

Sagittarius- Be careful that you haven’t given up on the possibility of joy in your life. With the Full Moon this week in your House of Fun what would it take for you to say, “Oh what the hell!” and then do something enjoyable? The Sun is transiting your House of Groups so make sure you accept any invitations that come your way. Uranus could bring some unexpected adventures and maybe a new companion to help you explore this mysterious new world of happy. Mr. Saturn in your sign will still be your chaperone for a while, but he may just be willing to look the other way this time. Will you risk it?

Capricorn- We can go all the way to the other side of the earth but our issues will always follow us. An obstacle now may appear to be a set back, but a Full Moon this week at the bottom of your chart is going to birth a new you to rise to the occasion. Just remember babies don’t want to be born, they’re forced to. In fact they’re literally thrown out kicking and screaming. You’ve been praying for a change and now the time has come. All you have to do is be willing to change your mind; piece of cake, right? Mr. Saturn’s haiku this week is for you. Enjoy.

“You can’t expect what

Will set you free, only hope

That you accept it”

Aquarius- Discretion may be the better part of valor for you this week. The temptation to speak your mind may be irresistible during the Aries Full Moon, but remember, a diplomatic Libra Sun is illuminating that Moon so keep to the Taoist principle that the Superior Individual shows his or her intelligence by concealing it. Besides, whomever this individual is that you’d like to unload on, they might just have something you will need in the future. Mr. Saturn say’s, “take your lead from Sydney Greenstreet in “The Maltese Falcon,” that dude was smooth.”

Pisces- The lessons you are learning now are not just about succeeding at whatever it is you need to accomplish, but also that you master the excesses of your personality in the process. The Full Moon this week in your House of Self Worth opposing a balanced Libra Sun in the House of Shared Resources will be trying to show you the connections that exist between how you feel about yourself and then how that attitude is reflected in the surrounding world. Mr. Saturn would summarize it as, “good luck is about who you are, not what you do.”

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #3

Weekly Horoscopes for 9/25 – 10/1 2017

 Hi kids!!! Welcome to the newest installment of “Mr. Saturn’s Stars”. Why don’t you get comfortable, take a deep breath, sit back, and relax. You have another 12 words to read before reality hits the fan and the lessons begin….<3

 

Aries- What would you like to see working better in your life? With Venus and Mars in your House of Health and Routines the time has come for some positive changes. Consider going for a make over, hiring a personal trainer, or even renovating your home or office space. The arc of the Moon this week through Sagittarius, Capricorn, and Aquarius will be telling you to “Acknowledge what needs to be done and then take the necessary steps. In addition Mr. Saturn would add, “and stop whining how difficult things are, it only makes matters that much worse.”

Taurus- As a Sagittarius Moon squares both Neptune and Saturn to start the week, you may be torn between being convinced you’ll be successful and worrying that the Universe is against you. By mid-week a Capricorn Moon along with Pluto, Venus, and Mars should be of assistance in helping you to understand that the truth is not the reflection of a mood, but rather a realization that exists somewhere between hope and pessimism in that unavoidable place known as effort. With the Moon in Aquarius over the weekend don’t be surprised if you hear Mr. Saturn whispering over your shoulder, “Build it, and they will come…. Go the distance!”

Gemini- You say you’re ready for a change, but with Neptune sitting at the top of your chart are you really sure what that means? Venus and Mars in your House of Foundations is like having one of those property-flipping couples from Cable TV show up at your door offering to transform your life into a more “open concept.” That may seem exciting, but are you ready to start digging under the surface of your day-to-day in order to see what needs to be repaired, or even trashed altogether? Mr. Saturn’s advice would be, “when people say they’re ready, it usually means they’re ready for what they already know. Real change needs to be a complete mystery, so be careful what you ask for……”

Cancer- Mr. Saturn say’s, “Growing pains are not just for kids.” You have learned that quite well over the last few months my crabby friend, having fretted and worried over every single change that has come down the pike for you and yours. But rejoice, an epiphany is at hand! Venus, Mars, and Mercury in your House of Thinking are finally grounding all the visions Neptune has been downloading to you from the heavens. These realizations can be crystalized by simply repeating the Magick words, “LET GO”. You are about to enter a very creative phase when Jupiter goes into Scorpio next month, so get started now by doing something completely different, like forgiving yourself.

Leo- There is nothing sadder than seeing a Lion in captivity, unless of course that Lion is wearing the key to his cage around his neck. You’ve felt stuck for a while now, but if you’d just take a good look in the mirror you’d see that the key to freedom is in your possession. You’re ready for a change and you have the resources to make it happen. The question is, do you believe you deserve to have your dreams? With Jupiter and Uranus in your Houses of Writing and Philosophy this would probably be an excellent time to start organizing your creative ideas into a formal project. Once you’ve made the effort, Mr. Saturn in your House of Creativity might very well suggest, “If you need an editor, I’m available.

Virgo- With Venus and Mars aspecting Pluto in your House of Creativity and Romance your charisma at this time is undeniable, so make sure you get out there and work it! Look for a new job, promote your ideas, but remember, with Neptune in your House of Partnerships don’t make the mistake of being too agreeable or you could end up getting played. Jupiter and Uranus in opposing money houses could indicate either windfalls or rip-offs, so be careful. In short Mr. Saturn would advise, “Grass, gas, or ass, but no one rides for free!”

Libra- The Sun will be in your sign for the next month so don’t waste it! This week the Moon will be moving through your areas of Ideas, Foundations, and Creativity, so Mr. Saturn say’s get out there and start searching around to promote your ideas and creative projects, especially those involving writing or healing modalities. Relationships could be challenging at this time. What would be very helpful though in eliminating possible problems with partners and family would be a willingness to be honest and communicate. With Neptune in your House of Work and Routines things could get confusing, so don’t take anything for granted in your dealings with others.

Scorpio- Jupiter transiting through the secret part of your chart has been a protective influence for you at work. As a result you have been able to grow and mature in the face of some very difficult challenges. Now though you have the time (if you want) to focus on your personal life and the things that are closer to your heart. Get in touch with a friend you haven’t seen in a while, or spend some time with a special young person in your life. Follow through on that idea you are always thinking or talking about but never investing any time in. Take the time to “do you”. You are the inspiration for Mr. Saturn’s haiku this month, so put that thinking cap on!

Is your “free” time spent

Like a skydiver who thinks

Falling is flying?

Sagittarius- Neptune is a very slow moving planet and its action in our chart is subtle. Imagine filling a dirty pot with hot water and then letting it soak overnight so that the crusty leftover food will be easier to clean away. Neptune will be doing this in your House of Home and Family for several more years, meaning that any difficulties you are having now with your parents or siblings are intended to change you into what you need to be as opposed to what they want you to be. Pluto is your wingman on this as well, meaning your karma is at work, so pay attention! Mr. Saturn say’s “karma is like a Ping-Pong match. If you try to win then play only continues. The idea is to walk away and break the cycle.”

Capricorn- Your immediate reality has you extremely frustrated and you have lost sight of the forest for the trees. Venus, Mars, and Mercury in your House of Philosophy have you struggling to make sense of your recent losses (Pluto) in the midst of a foggy present (Neptune). In addition, a Jupiter and Uranus opposition at the top and bottom of your chart has you struggling to keep sight of the stars that represent your dreams as you stand on the deck of a dramatically rocking ship piloted by Mr. Saturn, who is giving an Oscar worthy performance as the domineering Captain Bligh to your morally torn Mr. Christian.

Aquarius- You pride yourself as a “thinker” who knows it all, but as of late your philosophical outlook has only been about control. You want the environment to facilitate your comfort, when the smarter approach would be to let the environment transform you beyond your current limitations. The arc of the Moon this week will bring home a lesson of responsibility when it meets with Pluto in your House of Confinement. A “Personal New Moon” in your sign will follow this over the weekend just as Mercury enters Libra. Mr. Saturn would advise that the writing on the wall at this time is about balance and compromise, not control.

Pisces- As long as Neptune is in your sign it’ll seem like you’re living in San Francisco when the fog rolls in off Alcatraz and the harbor is reduced to zero visibility. A crowd of planets now in Virgo opposing Neptune may act like a spotlight and reveal to you something you’d rather not see; remember Bogie’s surprise in the Maltese Falcon when he discovers his dead partner down at the foggy pier? Mr. Saturn in your House of Career and Uranus in your house of Self Worth might be indicating it’s time to conform a little and accept how things are, even if it’s not how you want them to be. A current relationship may seem like the perfect escape, just don’t become someone else’s idea of you.

Mr. Saturn’s Stars #2 9/18-9/24, 2017

Horoscopes for 9/18 – 9/24 2017

 Hi kids! Welcome to “Mr. Saturn’s Stars” for this week. I hope you will all enjoy your new horror-scopes….oh, I mean horoscopes……lol !!! Just a little Saturnian humor, excuse me.

Aries- Last week was about career and this week will be about relationships. Wow, you look unhappy all of a sudden. Both the Sun and the Moon will be crossing from Virgo into Libra and entering your House of Partnerships. The Moon will do it early in the week and the Sun over the weekend, which means you’ll worry about what’s going on way more than you should and then have to deal with it anyway. A Jupiter-Uranus opposition will bring up the same old story of your independence and control issues and Mr. Saturn will be there in your House of Philosophy to make sure you realize the problem is you and not anyone else!

Taurus- Cows are generally nice creatures until they’re not! Ever see one in the middle of the road causing a traffic jam? Uranus will be causing you some deep down anxiety once Venus enters Virgo and you realize that you’re going to have to stop sitting there and actually do something if you’d like to maintain your comfort zone. Mr. Saturn’s comment about the situation would be, “Have you really been that comfortable anyway?” Pluto in your House of Philosophy and Venus, Mars, and Mercury in your House of Creativity are planning a protest for change and you might want to listen to their talking points, “2, 4, 6, 8, we don’t have the time to wait!” In other words, do what you have to do to improve your current situation or find another one…and soon! “

Gemini- Venus, Mars, and Mercury in your Home and Family area are in aspect to Pluto in your House of shared resources, indicating your situation with a partner might be facing some immediate changes. That could mean establishing some new routines, transforming your roles, or the two of you moving on separately. The arc of the Moon this week through Virgo, Libra, and Scorpio would say you’ve already tried pretty hard to fix the situation, so maybe it’s just time to go? If you’re convinced that some future event you’ve been looking forward to must transpire before any change is possible, Mr. Saturn would simply respond, “How much is your quality of life suffering in the meantime?

Cancer- With Mr. Saturn in your House of Health challenging Neptune in your House of Philosophy maybe it’s time to realize that all your worrying and stress is slapping you around but good! Must you always feel it’s your fault when someone close to you makes a mistake? Stop using your loved ones as an excuse not to deal with the roots of your own fears and anxieties. With Uranus in your Public Sector there is a lot going on now beyond your control. Deal with what you can and let the rest go for the time being. Jupiter in your House of Home and Family is currently protecting you, but the question Mr. Saturn is writing on the wall is, “Do you think you deserve it?”

Leo- Mr. Saturn sometimes likes to role-play and his character this week is going to be your boss at work. What costume will you put on for this game….a revolutionary, a slave, or a free person? With a stellium of Planets currently in your House of Self Worth conspiring with Pluto in the House of Work, it’s time to reconsider how hard you should have to try in order to be appreciated. The Moon in Libra mid-week will contact benevolent Jupiter and hopefully those two can convince you to value yourself regardless of what anyone else does. When the Moon enters Scorpio over the weekend you’ll hear from Mr. Saturn when he asks, “Hey there Mr. King of the Jungle, Are you just going to complain about the situation or are you going to do something about it?

Virgo- With 5 major planets in your sign at the beginning of the week you’re really feeling your oats, but what’s your focus? Have you ever heard the expression “giving your power away?” Stop looking at the pursuit of your dreams like a lottery where the percentages are always against you. Uranus opposing Jupiter in your House of Self Worth may be making it seem like what you want is out of your control, but as Mr. Saturn always likes to sing to himself when the going gets tough, “The harder they come, the harder they fall, one and all!”

Libra- In Zen the Mind is referred to as “The Chattering Monkey”. With 5 planets currently in your House of The Inner Self that Monkey is literally screaming it’s head off trying to orchestrate all your inner thoughts into some kind of coherent strategy. The New Moon in Virgo mid-week will offer an outlet for all this mental activity as it squares Mr. Saturn in your House of Writing. Maybe all these new thoughts you’re having require a new you as well? Here’s a haiku Mr. Saturn has written with that new you in mind;

The most difficult

Place on earth to escape from

Is the jail of “I”

Scorpio- Your life may seem to be in order (or at least under control within your comfort zone) but what do you want? You realize things could be better and you are quite capable at whatever you try to do, nevertheless you are hesitant to break out creatively and take a risk on yourself. When will you finally get sick of working for people who should be working for you? The arc of the Moon this week will pass through your House of Dreams and House of Confinement before it crosses over the horizon and enters Scorpio. Mr. Saturn, the famous critic, feels that the Moon’s path in your chart is symbolic of the proverbial Phoenix rising from the ashes. What do you think?

Sagittarius- Early in the week a New Moon along with 3 other major planets will be in your House of Public Image, all of them generally opposing Neptune in the House of Home and Family. This will occur on the Virgo-Pisces axis, which is the line in the Zodiac between the real and imagined. Whatever you think you want from life at this time, just make sure you’re not doing it just to satisfy (or rebel against) what others may expect of you. As the Moon enters Scorpio over the weekend you’ll probably want to either pull away or lash out, just don’t expect that bottle you’re nipping at behind Mr. Saturn’s back to provide you with any real escape.

Capricorn- Jupiter in your public sector and Mr. Saturn behind the scenes are causing difficulties in making up your mind about some recent choices. This has been a time of great change and with the current influx of planets into Virgo you are probably unfairly criticizing everything in your life before anything has a chance to really unfold. The best thing you can probably do now is to utilize a Moon-Neptune aspect over the coming weekend and take the time to nurture yourself. Consider visiting a spa or taking a Spiritual Retreat. Even Mr. Saturn likes to hear a friendly “Namaste” from time to time.

Aquarius- Mr. Saturn say’s, “Be careful what you wish for.” As a fixed air sign you are more vulnerable to illusion than most, simply because air is meant to move and fixing it in a vacuum is an artificial contrivance no matter how perfect the notion of a vacuum may seem. You are looking for control over your daily environment but at what cost? The New Moon in Virgo at the beginning of the week will drive your insecurities, so by the time a Scorpio Moon and Neptune meet over the weekend you will have justified to yourself whatever you feel is necessary to accomplish your “Manifest Destiny”. By month’s end when Mercury enters Libra we’ll see if your calculations have been correct.

Pisces- With Neptune in your sign the fog has descended all around, so make sure that what you think you see in the distance is what it appears to be. Money is an issue at this time as Jupiter and Uranus challenge you to choose between responsibility and luxury when juggling your expenses. Venus entering Virgo could reveal a dangerous naiveté regarding the resources you are assuming you have. A new love interest may actually be more calculating than you are, but in all this fog Mr. Saturn just thinks it’s a case of “dumb and dumber” with both of you blinded by your own selfishness. Be careful nonetheless.