Weekly Horoscopes for 4/16-4/22, 2018
Hi kids!!! Welcome back to Mr. Saturn’s Stars. Looking around now it seems like everyone I know is either going through some deep shit or knows someone who is. It reminds me of the movie “The Exorcist” when the Younger Priest say’s to the Older One, “Why the little girl?” and the Older Priest replies, “I think it’s to make us despair.” Perhaps that’s evil’s only real purpose, to make us doubt ourselves in the face of adversity so that we become convinced of our inability to ever change anything? But then again, maybe it’s up to us to keep going at all costs? After all, what do you think all those resurrection myths from all over the world like Osiris, Dionysius, Jesus, Odin, etc. are about if not to inspire us to keep searching for the best in ourselves? Ultimately we’ll never really know what we’re capable of unless we try, so let’s get busy with this week’s horoscopes.
Aries- With both Mercury and Uranus in your sign you’re probably feeling tenser now than usual. Especially since Mercury is about to re-enter into a restrictive square with Mr. Saturn as he goes retrograde and Uranus is on the verge of doing a gangsta thing with the Sun that will make you feel as if nobody should be able to tell you what to do. Pluto will also be slowing down this week to go station/retrograde, which will allow the planet of change to remain in a beneficial and creative alignment with Venus in your House of Self Worth for a while longer. With that in mind, if you can manage to let circumstances make you more introspect and adaptable instead of letting situations put you in a corner armed only with your insecurity, then perhaps you’ll be able to get out of this week with a few bucks in your jeans instead of with a hangover in a regrettable place. Choose wisely.
Taurus- As the Sun moves into your sign,try not to be overly concerned with things you don’t have and/or circumstances that have not yet come to pass. Especially since both are inherently illusions and such speculation can lead a nuts and bolts thinker like yourself straight into Worryville faster than Dorothy can tap her ruby slippers together three times. Meanwhile Jupiter retrograde in your House of Relationships opposing Venus in your sign could cause you to take on more than you should in either a romantic or business partnership. Let Pluto mediate this situation as he slows down to go station/retrograde. Maybe the planet of transformation can help you remember all those times in the past when you tried to do too much and got burned. Maybe this time will be the charm and you’ll go with the flow to a place that you’ve always dreamed about but never been…Happyville!
Gemini- As long as Neptune is in your House of Public Image and squaring your sign you need to be consciously paying attention to what you say and don’t assume people aren’t listening too closely. Of course the obvious problem that could arise from not being consistent in what you say is that people will think you’re a liar. Then again, you could very well be stretching the truth intentionally and with Mercury now direct in the sign of Aries and your House of Groups, you’ll probably be less likely to heed the advice I just offered because of course you’ll feel you know better. At that point enter Mr. Saturn, who will unceremoniously tell Mercury to “SHUT UP AND LISTEN!” What a fiasco, especially since the Revolution Brothers Mars and Pluto are both about to align with a retrograde Jupiter in the Machiavellian sign of Scorpio. If you could have just keep your mouth shut to begin with you might have been able to skate by all this, but nooooooooo!
Cancer- Before the Sun leaves Aries it will conjunct Uranus in your House of Career and Public Image, so be willing to be who you are without any apologies and you might just be surprised at how well you’re received. Mercury will also be going direct in that same House of Career, so if you’re dissatisfied with where you are professionally polish up that resume and get it out there to all possible points of opportunity. At the same time, Venus in earthy Taurus is passing through your House of Dreams and aligning with Pluto, who is about to go retrograde in your House of Relationships, meaning this could be the time to either call in a favor with a colleague who remembers you fondly, or else rekindle the romance between you and your significant other. Either way you’ve already paid for your ticket to paradise so “cash it in and we’ll leave tonight.”
Leo- Your job could be very eventful for you at this time with Saturn, Mars, and Pluto all on the same shift in your House of Work. Mars and Pluto are all about putting your nose to grindstone, while Saturn on the verge of going retrograde in an extended square to Mercury is about making sure others see how hard you bust your ass. Jupiter retrograde opposing Venus in your House of Career would then represent the next step of making sure you are adequately compensated for all you do, which in the past was something you always felt should be offered rather than asked for. Hopefully when the Sun passes into your House of Career at the end of the week you’ll be beyond believing such bullshit and will be ready to demand what you want and go wherever you need to go to get it.
Virgo- Mars and Pluto moving closer together in your House of Creativity and aligning with Venus in your House of Philosophy is the passionate exclamation of “Why not?!!!” as Mercury in your House of Shared Resources argues with Saturn, also in your House of Creativity, about your sovereignty, freedom, and responsibilities in a business or emotional relationship. Jupiter retrograde in your House of Communication is there to remind you that being nice in the past didn’t work so maybe this time you should just do what you gotta do and let the other person feel cheated and disrespected for once. As the song goes, “It’s my life and I’ll do what I want!”……..Go ahead, be an Animal, you just might find you like it……Rrrrrrrrrr!!!
Libra- With Mercury in your House of Partnerships it is important for you to be reaching out this week both socially and professionally. Make it a point to reconnect with old friends as well as to explore some new work contacts. For the last few weeks Saturn, Pluto, and Mars in your House of Symbolic Foundations have been expanding your comfort zone to bungee chord proportions, while at the same time requiring you to consolidate your operational core to the size and efficiency of a two-man sniper team. Now you officially know what it’s like to be drawn and quartered. Just kidding… There is also some good news. Venus in your House of Transformation and Jupiter in your House of Earnings will be keeping their extended aspects with Pluto alive because he’s about to go retrograde, meaning that whether you realize it or not you’re already past what you’ve been worrying about because you’re on the verge of finding the solution. Keep your eyes open!
Scorpio- Mercury and Uranus are both in the hard charging sign of Aries as well as your House of Work, so it would probably be safe to say that being at the job now is sort of like being at the Alamo, except there’s no glory (or money) where you are. Saturn in your House of Communication is probably requiring you to listen to more crap than you’d like to from some one who currently has power over you, but take heart, Mars and Pluto in your House of Ideas are aligning nicely with Venus in your House of Relationships and Jupiter so it won’t be long before you’ll be moving on to greener pastures and will be able to tell your current slave master to take their job and shove it! I have also previously mentioned romance in your future, well, with Neptune in your House of Romance don’t bother trying to keep your eyes open so you can spot it because it will be a surprise when it happens…Hey, I bet you’re really curious now?
Sagittarius- Reality is not your forte at this time so be careful not to trust your compulsions or someone else’s promises all that much. Lessons are in store for you now, so don’t be that kid in class who raises their hand quickly and shouts, “I know, I know”, and then doesn’t. Mars and Pluto in your House of Self Worth aligning with Venus in your House of Work could make an opportunity on the job seem like a lucky break, but remember what I just said about reality. You bring more to the table than you give yourself credit for and if you haven’t realized that yet, well, someone else has so make sure whatever sort of deal you’re offered doesn’t make you too grateful simply because you have no idea what you’re worth.
Capricorn- Mercury and Uranus at the bottom of your chart are probably making you feel as if you’re caught up in the centrifugal force of a Whirling Dervish, yet with Mars, Saturn, and Pluto in your sign you’re undoubtedly weathering it as stoically as Mount Rushmore, at least that ‘s what it looks like from the outside. At the same time Neptune in your House of Thinking probably has you feeling befuddled and at a loss, although in reality you are in that idiot savant place where one can come to understand (and accept) that real creativity comes from the unknown and the unexpected, not from the known and the expected. Do you get what I’m saying? It’s only your control issues that have you feeling out of control; in reality you are going with the flow and are in harmony with your environment. Granted, you may be flying by the seat of your pants, but as the late Timothy Leary used to say, “In order to use your head you have to go out of your mind.”
Aquarius- This week when the Sun enters the sign of Taurus and your House of Symbolic Foundations it may finally dawn on you how strongly the fear of not having enough has been a significant motivating factor in your life. Likewise, the crowd of Capricorn Planets behind the scenes in your chart has had you so caught up with the mechanics of attaining success that you really haven’t taken the time to consider what the psychology behind your ambition is really all about. Perhaps it’s Jupiter in your House of Career that has you needing to be a star, or could it be Mercury with Uranus in your House of Communication that has you feeling the need to rebel? Me thinks it’s Neptune in your House of Self Worth that is causing you to lose sight of the forest for the trees. What would Mr. Saturn’s advice be? As a Poet once wrote, “The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom,” though I think he meant we discover what we really need by pursuing what we don’t need. But hey, you’re an Aquarius and you don’t take advice, you learn lessons the old fashioned way…….Suffer!
Pisces- This week when the Sun enters Taurus and your House of thinking and Saturn goes retrograde to meet it in your House of Dreams, whatever it is you have wanted as well as how to get it will slowly start to dawn on you. Of course this would have been obvious to any of the other signs at the onset of their ambitions, but since you’re a child of Neptune and your ruler is currently transiting your sign, fogginess is the meteorological norm for your mental landscape at this time. Oh well, better late than never. An extra-added bit of clarity should also come from Venus as she aligns beautifully with both Mars and Pluto, also in your House of Dreams, to help you along in your transformation from dreaming to manifestation. Of course none of this will happen over night so Mister Saturn would advise that before you jump the gun and get “Eight Miles High” about your prospects, just remember, “Signs in the street/ That say where you’re goin’/ Are somewhere/ Just being their own.