Mr. Saturn’s Stars #1

 Welcome to the weekly Horoscope column here at “the13thpath.com” known as “Mr. Saturn’s Stars.”

Introduction

You’re probably wondering why I would choose the name “Mr. Saturn’s Stars” for a column where people are supposedly looking for good news, or at the very least some hope. After all, isn’t Saturn one of the malefics in Astrology (the other being Mars) and aren’t those guys about anything but hope and good news? If that’s what you believe then before we can get to discussing horoscopes you need to first be introduced to the REAL Mr. Saturn, not the dark, negative image promoted by all those “fluffy bunny” types out there who will “Namaste” you into a coma if they get half a chance. The Mr. Saturn you need to meet is the guy that will tell you the truth, even if that’s the last thing your fragile, stressed out, and control driven ego wants to hear. Now why would Mr. Saturn be so willing to share the truth with you? Because he Loves you…..well, maybe not you personally, but he knows that in order for everything to truly be in harmony for all of us (and yes, that means you too!) everyone has to be responsible for holding up their end of the bargain. So if Mr. Saturn is willing to risk you not liking him as he teaches you the lesson of responsibility (which is actually the lesson of Love) then you can bet he probably cares more about you than just about anyone except your Mother.

Mr. Saturn is also a teacher, though don’t expect him to be politically correct and give you an award just for showing up. If you can’t handle criticism I would say stay away from Mr. Saturn, but that would be impossible. He will follow you like a Repo Man who Loves his job and sooner or later you will pay…and you will be better for it, maybe not right away, but soon, like the next time you have to respect yourself regardless if anyone else does. You see Mr. Saturn will deal with you even when you won’t deal with yourself. He will require that you learn how to sit in the vacuum of your self and breathe, even if you’re convinced you will either suffocate or die of loneliness in that wretched place. The French Poet Arthur Rimbaud once wrote, “A battle for the soul is as brutal as a battle of men…” well, the good news is, if you can handle the lessons assigned to you by Mr. Saturn then you will have received the requisite training to attain victory on that inevitable battlefield.

Mr. Saturn may be the least glamorous and the least touchy, feely of all the major planets, but he’s the most powerful because when he comes around he will change the other planets in your chart more than they can resist him (except for maybe Pluto). He will make Mercury sit still, turn Venus into an honest woman, calm Mars the f**k down, deflate Jupiter’s pompousness, convince Uranus to accept direction, and make Neptune more practical. He treats everyone here on Earth the same and he makes the Moon less sentimental. Furthermore he only changes his outfit every two years or so, which means he’s no trendy fashion victim and he knows what real value is. All in all it could be said that Mr. Saturn is truly an “Archetype for All Seasons”.

So you see? Mr. Saturn does Love you in his own unique way. Granted it is tough Love, but it’s unconditional. In fact, the only reason he gets up in the morning is because Mr. Saturn wants to make damn sure you learn to Love yourself as much as he feels duty bound to help you do it.

Sincerely, T.C. Eisele

 

Horoscopes for the week of 9/11/2017 – 9/17/2017

 Aries- Rams like to charge headlong into things and with Uranus currently in your sign this is especially true, however, Mr. Saturn can be a Uranus-whisperer if need be and with a little assistance from his buddy Jupiter he might just be able to steer you in the direction of caution. If you’re amenable to that then you’ll be able to channel the energy of the Sun, Mercury, and Mars in Virgo, along with Pluto in Capricorn, to transform your usually impatient energy into a practical (and profitable) attention to details. After such an efficient workweek you’ll definitely be ready to forget your worries, so go on, party with that exuberant Leo Moon over the weekend.

Taurus- Sensual Taureans love their creature comforts, although at the beginning of the week you may discover that a little juggling of resources may be necessary. Act responsibly at this time and you will live to play another day. Mr. Saturn would routinely advise, “waste not, want not,” but this week he might also add, “try to save something for a rainy day.” This could also be a time for some of you Bulls to take your health a little more seriously and start an exercise or diet program…after all, do you really need to over indulge or are you just trying to distract yourself from something you’d rather not think about?

Gemini- You are an intellectual sign and would like others to think you know everything, but this may be a time when your feelings of inferiority just can’t be rationalized away no matter how artful and clever your mind may be at inventing excuses. Neptune transiting your House of Public Image has been allowing you to hide behind a mask, but with Mercury, Mars, and The Sun all at the bottom of the chart now you should be seeking help rather than trying to hide behind pride and false bravado. True pride would make you want to face your shortcomings instead of trying to convince others(or worse, yourself) that everything is just fine.

Cancer- You feel an undeniable need to break out of the rut you’re in, but what to do? Is a situation thwarting you or are you just trapped in an image of yourself that’s no longer who you really are? How you think of yourself at this time is key. The compromises that you always seem to feel you have to make may be exacting a higher toll on your self-esteem (and health) than you realize. Stop looking into the mirror of other people’s approval to see who you are. You can really have a break through now if you are determined to stop feeling guilty about what you want, and need!

Leo- You are the sign of leadership but keep in mind, a leader can sometimes become enslaved by those who depend excessively on him or her. Maybe those who are draining your energy could learn to do for themselves if you weren’t around all the time to provide them an inexhaustible supply of support and acceptance? Mr. Saturn would say it’s time to put your self first instead of worrying about someone whose current lessons may be about taking care of his or her own shit. Unless of course you don’t think you deserve to be a little more selfish? Think about that.

Virgo- With the Sun, Mercury, and Mars in your sign opposing Neptune in the House of Partnerships it’s time to re-evaluate the dynamics in your relationship. During the week as the Moon progresses on its route through Gemini and Cancer you might need to be more flexible and think about what would be best for both of you as new career choices loom on the horizon. Or are you feeling stuck because you know that what you need to do might end up providing some serious challenges for your partner to deal with? This is not a time for selfishness or suffering in silence, but rather for communication. Of course that would require you to admit your fears instead of projecting them onto someone else.

Libra- This is a time to put yourself out there and make a push to get to the next level in your career. Difficult interactions with others may be showing you that your time in a certain situation has come to an end. During mid-week with the Moon in Cancer and the Sun, Mercury, and Mars working behind the scenes you could get a helping hand from someone you assisted in the past, which could result in a refreshing new direction. Assume you deserve this break and just continue being the dependable professional you are.

Scorpio- You have been less than thrilled with your work situation for a while now, which currently begs a pair of questions, “What do you want?” and “What are you willing to do for it?” Mr. Saturn might also add, “What do you think you deserve?” As the week ends with a Leo Moon transiting your House of Career and activating both Saturn and Uranus, you could realize that help has always been available to assist you in moving toward your longtime dream, it’s just been a matter of your needing to ask for it. So what are you waiting for?

Sagittarius- With Saturn in your sign you are not going to avoid having to eventually answer for your laziness in terms of career, especially this week with the Sun, Mercury, and Mars all opposing Neptune in your House of Foundations. Being sociable is not a substitute for hard work no matter who seems to be laughing and partying along with you. At the beginning of the week a tendency to want to escape through a relationship may seem like a good idea, but make sure you’re listening when Mr. Saturn whispers in your ear, “What does this person REALLY want?” Nuff said!!!

Capricorn- Pluto has been in your sign for a while, so I’m sure the whole notion of letting go has become a theme you’re already quite familiar with. In mid week as the Moon transits your House of Partnerships you may start to realize you need to let go of that long distance, cyber-substitute for a relationship you’ve been dawdling with. After all, isn’t it just an excuse for being afraid to have a real relationship in real time with an actual person? What are you scared of? “Mr. Saturn asks, adding “I guess that’s the 64,000 dollar question.”

Aquarius- As the Moon enters Gemini to begin the week you will be overflowing with all sorts of ideas for creative projects and by the time the Moon enters Leo over the weekend you will have already told everyone you know about your inspirations. You talk a great game but where is the discipline, organization, and persistence necessary to manifest these ideas? With Pluto camped out in the House of Your Secret Self and Mars and Mercury transiting your House of Death and Transformation, Mr. Saturn can’t help but make the cryptic comment,

“The Sun was born from

The collapsing of a Star

And now it’s your turn”

Pisces- What constitutes an illusion is that at the time we totally fail to recognize it as such. Of course Mr. Saturn will always be there for you to point out such ironies, however, with Neptune currently transiting through your sign my Pisces friend, you will no doubt be deaf to his counsel. Jupiter and Uranus are inspiring you to recreate your life on several levels and their motivation will lead you to go wherever it is you feel you need to go, whether that results in a success or simply a lesson learned. Nevertheless, Mr. Saturn has composed this haiku in your honor;

“Be careful what you

Think you want, it can only

Be just what it is”

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